MANILA. Having spent much of Easter nailed to a large wooden cross, Raul Aquino says crucifixion is more painful than he previously thought. The 25-year-old haberdasher, who is being treated at a Manila hospital for tetanus and severe nappy rash, told reporters that, while spiritually uplifting, the experience was “freaking sore”.
Every year thousands of Filipinos are nailed to crosses to emulate the Christian faith’s most famous act of self-sacrifice, an ordeal Aquino has always hoped to experience.
“The crucifixion of Christ was the most singular, individual and one-off act our faith recognizes. And so we try to replicate it tens of thousands of times every year.
“He died on the cross so that we wouldn’t have to suffer. That’s why we do it, why we suffer: so we won’t have to suffer.”
However, he said, this was the first year he had joined fellow devotees on the cross.
“It wasn’t as spiritual as I hoped,” admitted Aquino. “When the first nail went in I kind of threw up in my mouth a little.”
He said his ordeal was aggravated by having been scourged earlier with a tainted whip. Professional scourgers abound at the Easter ritual, offering to flog participants for a small fee, and novice Aquino opted to approach his cousin, a veteran scourger.
“Cousin Nino has been scourging for years, ten dollars for twenty lashes. He’s got his own Centurion costume and everything. I thought it was safe.
“But it turned out Nino had been eating chicken with prego sauce, and he got it all over the whip.”
Doctors confirmed that Aquino’s back had been “thoroughly permeated” with chicken fat and garlic.
Although in pain and prohibitively smelly, Aquino says he has no regrets.
“I have new respect for Jesus,” he said. “When he did it there weren’t jumping castles or a beer tent or any of the stuff we had this weekend.
“That’s hard core, man.”
