PRETORIA. The government says they are seriously considering changing the name of Youth Day, which is celebrated as a public holiday in South Africa on 16th June, in order to reflect the current age of the original participants.
A spokesperson for the government, Middleage Dladla said sticking with the current name was nothing more than a celebration of mediocrity.
“The last thing the current crop of youth managed to do en masse was sign up for Mxit,” he said.
He added that while running the gauntlet with paedophiles in exchange for free chat facilities was a commendable pursuit, it wasn’t quite as lofty or selfless as coming under fire from illiterate racists while on a quest for freedom from a repressive regime.
He added that the final straw had been when the youth of today had chosen to participate in Youth Day 2010 “by, like, doing whatever.”
“The problem with the Youth Day is that it is wasted on the young,” he said. “They will probably spend the day sleeping, rutting and drinking. It will be business as usual for them,” he added, “Just like a normal school day.”
Dladla said the government had toyed with several names for the new public holiday, including Eternal Youth Day, Once Were Warriors Day, Malema Day and the Zimbabwe-inspired Veteran’s Day.
“We drew inspiration from our neighbour Comrade Mugabe,” said Dladla, referring to the former’s 2008 decision to appoint new war veterans after all the real ones had died.
“If we have learned anything from him it’s how to move with the times,” he said.
“Or how to stop time completely so you don’t have to move. He’s good at that as well,” said Dladla
